Should Married Women Vote Against Their Spouse?

Blogger’s Note: After this post went viral all over the Internet, due to the emotional responses I received, I thought it important to change my “hook” title to say what I really mean.  Also, this is not a sin issue in Scripture, just an opinion from a Christian woman who wants to apply all of Scripture to all of her daily life.  This is just food for thought, but is ultimately up to you and your spouse to decide.  There is no judgment cast on those who don’t agree with me.  Thanks for reading!

From a Christian perspective, in a perfect, biblical society, I think married women should not have needed the right to vote. 

I first heard that statement expressed by people close to me and I was aghast, sputtering.  This marked a huge victory in our history!  Women are equal citizens of this countryyour_vote_counts!  We raise the next politicians!  We should have a say!

But these people went on to explain and they really convinced me.

Stick with me and make sure you read to the end.

This doesn’t apply to single adult women, as they have no head of their own home, and many are out in our workforces and living on their own. 

This thought is for married women.

God has placed women to be under their husbands.  He said, in the Garden of Eden, “Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”  Genesis 3:16

He also stated it clearly in the New Testament: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, His body, of which He is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.”  Ephesians 5:22

Submission only works because Christ also told men to love their wives and sacrifice for them, to treat them with respect like they would their own body.  So this is not a post to bash men, or to complain about their leadership, or to discuss men that are hard to submit to.  Simply put, it’s about what women’s role is according to the Bible.  And, like it or not, your husband is to be your leader and you are to submit to him.  God compares it to the church submitting to Christ!  That’s a lofty comparison!

Therefore, by giving married women the right to vote, I think that our country placed, in women’s hands, the right to go against their husbands in a very grand way.  By having an equal vote, they can oppose their husbands and technically nullify their vote.  A woman who votes against her husband’s vote, in my opinion, as I interpret Scripture, is out from under his authority.

If Christian women are not supposed to say to their husbands, “Forget you.  You picked this pastor and this church, but I disagree, so I’m going to a different church,”  (Now, feel free to appeal to him and pray hard if you feel like the church is a bad choice!) and if Christian women are not supposed to say, “I don’t like your rules in this house, so I’m giving the children opposing rules and you can just live with it,” then I don’t think it’s Biblical for them to be able to say, “I don’t trust you to elect the proper leaders for our country.  I’m supposed to be under you, and you’re under the government, but I don’t trust you to elect the right boss for yourself and our family.  I come out from under your leadership to nullify your vote by voting against you”?!  That seems like such a high insult to me, and makes your husband’s opinion and vote worthless.

Married ladies, since we DO have the right to vote and we need more Christians and conservatives voting, I suggest the Biblical way is to vote the same as your husband, or, if you disagree with him, refrain from voting.  But talk to your husband and see what he wants you to do.  Talk to your husband about voting and appeal to him if you feel like he’s wrong.  Ask him what he feels comfortable with.  Ask him if nullifying his vote by opposing his has hurt him as the leader of your home.  I think that we have been given extra power to vote and support our husband’s leadership for our family and influence on this country.  We can change the nation together with our combined votes.

What are your thoughts?  And have you discussed this topic with your husband to see how he feels and if he cares about how you vote?  Have you searched God’s Word and prayed about this topic?  And do you vote regularly with your spouse?  It’s an honor to have this privilege.  Let’s use it for God’s glory!

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18 thoughts on “Should Married Women Vote Against Their Spouse?

    • Nope. Just one Christian woman’s ideas on interpreting the submission passage in Scripture to every day life. If you search Scripture and don’t like it, ditch it. It’s just my idea. 🙂

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  1. First, kudos for being bold! Second, I’ve had the same train of thought before. Thankfully WE CAN VOTE! As you said . . . when placed with our husband’s vote, it adds to the number of total votes for a certain candidate. That’s a good thing! I do feel you are rightly interpreting this, no matter how unpopular that may be.

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  2. Just a quick thought on the statement, “Submission only works because Christ also told men to love their wives and sacrifice for them, to treat them with respect like they would their own body. ” Submission is not predicated on a woman’s husband loving her as Christ loves the church. Those are separate issues ~ different commands given to different groups, neither hinged on the other.

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    • Very good point.
      I should have said, “Submission is supposed to work in accordance with men loving their wives and treating them with respect. However, we’re still commanded to submit.”
      Good catch there.

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  3. I have a husband who tends to use the phrase, “Honey, you really are always right.” This is a lovely thing to hear, and obviously, he’s WRONG hahaha, but he knows that I read up on political and social stuff more than he has time for. He asks my opinion. Sometimes, we don’t agree. There wer times we went to the poll to vote for different candidates, and I’d say, “Hey, why don’t we just stay home, cuz we’re cancelling each other out.” My husband has the highest respect for my intellect. And when we don’t agree, he’s okay with letting me vote my way. Usually,l years down the road, he might go, “Well, should have listened to you.” I think a man who is a smart leader of a home recognizes his wife’s strengths, where she is more skilled than he is, and takes her counsel. A man who is just a tyrant doesn’t. A man who is like Christ, humble, wise, not just seeking his own, knows that women have valuable things to say, and are often, VERY often…right. 😀

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    • I agree. I never said a man shouldn’t respect his wife’s intellect. I think they should be in constant discussion about this, and a woman should give her thoughts and the husband should listen. However, in the long run, I believe it to be his decision.
      Sounds like you and your husband have a great marriage!

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  4. OH, and one more thing. A woman, just like a man, answers to GOD first. In other words, if my husband were to say, “Honey, I wanna do a threesome with another woman.” I don’t have to submit. If my husband were to say, “Baby, I don’t want to be a dad. Abort that child.” I don’t have to submit. Similarly, if I think his voting is actually supporting a candidate who violates my moral sensibility, I will refuse to submit. I’d rather not vote than vote against my conscience.

    I must submit to GOD before anyone, even my husband. So, if God leads me to do X and hubby wants Y, hubby is gonna get told no. Period. I will happily explain why. I will use Scripture or tell him I had a vision, whatever was the thing that lead to my decision. I’m a highly rational person, and I tend to have a lot of introspection and reasons for why I choose or do things. Fortunately, God gave me a man who listens, who understands that in Christ and in my humanity, I am his equal, carrying just as he does the imago dei and endowed with spiritual gifts I am bound to put to use, even in marriage. If a man must be willing to die for his wife, a love that self-sacrificial, then you’d think he would be willing to seek his wife’s counsel, listen to her concerns, ask her opinions, and not run roughshod over her. The closer we move to Eden–a man and a woman, walking with God in sincerity and equality of being–the happier and better the marriage. A true leader works to make the led’s life better and more fulfilling, not less.

    I would not have married a man who was not reasonable and who doesn’t listen. I’d have rather entered a cloistered community and remained a virgin my whole life than marry a controlling fool. 🙂

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    • Right. A husband should never tell his wife to sin, and she should never sin. However, if she feels like his vote is wrong, she should definitely talk to him – and maybe talk to him a lot. But then she could always refrain from voting against him. That would not be sin. However, if your husband doesn’t care how you vote, then you go right ahead and do what you want. That’s up to your home. 🙂

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  5. I will say, and it’s not popular in this day and age to speak of marital roles like leading or submitting, but it’s still something we MUST grapple with, even with all the Scriptural complexities, it IS a part of the apostolic world. I am fully convinced God will honor a decision made out of faith and conscience. For the woman who thinks it right to refrain from voting or to vote as her husband does, and is doing it out of a spirit of humility or submission or love or all three, I think it’s honorable and virtuous. If a woman does it grudgingly and out of obligation, it is no virtue. And for someone else who has a more egalitarian approach, if it’s done out of faith in how they understand Scripture, I think that has virtue. If it’s not done out of faith and love, it probably has little to recommend it. “To him who eats” and “to him who does not eat”–be fully convinced and trust God.

    I have Christian friends who are much more conservative in their interpretations or positions and we might have very extended argumentation (in the classic sense, not the “we’re having a big fight” sense) and we still have the love of Christ and respect for each other. We simply do not interpret passages in the same light. We do, however, have the same faith and same Lord who will ultimately reward us based on what we did out of love and out of faith not out of fear or out of coercion or out of pride.

    So, I think women need to follow their consciences before God. Always. To betray conscience is to betray the walk with God.

    You should not vote independently if you feel it would be against your wifely submission. And I should not vote dependently if I believe it goes against my freedom in Christ to follow my path of wisdom. And even so, we might BOTH be right, because we are trying to do what we have concluded from Holy Writ to be the proper path of submission.

    And I say this as a real doofus who makes a lot of bad decisions and has besetting sins. It always has to go back to: What is it that God calls me to do? I either do it or I don’t, and that’s on me.

    God is pleased, I think, that we even seem to try to obey in small matters, the very seeking of it, even if we may not get all the details right. We are wanting to get to truth and in an age that is even denying there is ultimate truth, that’s not easy. So, you making this decision is you taking a stand on your faith and path, and you should do exactly that, even if the whole world disagrees.

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    • Anonymous, I loved the link you posted. Certainly a great article. I still don’t agree that voting against your husband is a sin (because nothing in Scripture says so), but it’s something I can’t do according to my own conscience.
      The article you posted was great though!

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      • A husband being insensitive to his wife’s opinions and views is unloving, and a lack of love is sin. So this goes both ways. Each couple has to decide. There is nothing in Scripture that speaks about voting, per se, but a lot about humility, love, gentleness, kindness. And he gave women brains as much as he gave men brains. Each woman chooses to believe and follow Jesus without having interference from anyone…it is between God and the woman. I figure voting, as a private civic exercise, does not require interference from anyone but the voter and God–leading the conscience. Those who feel different are free to live out the marital pact as they wish, but tyranny is not part of it. Mutual consideration is. God gives us free will, to the point that we can even harm ourselves in exercising free will. I would think my husband is not higher than God to constrain me when God does not.

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